Dates can be stressful, especially first dates, but by following some dating etiquette, a woman can relax and enjoy the experience. Here are some guidelines to help you handle awkward situations involving the bill, and some other general dating advice for women.
Dating can be quite hard sometimes. While men perfectly understand fellow males, women, on the other hand, seem like unknown creatures from Venus. One wrong move – and you are retired from the game. Though there are a lot of ‘dating advice for men’ materials on the Internet, nothing guarantees you to master the knowledge of how to be a gentleman. And ladies love gentlemen.
Date or No Date?
First of all, we have to settle the most obvious matter: whether it is a date or not.
Society has created some patterns and traditions for dating. It is said that a man should always be a gentleman and pay when dating a lady. A woman, on the other hand, should treat her date. If he helps you with putting your coat on, it should be returned with a cup of coffee or a meal. Gentleman will not rest until he returns the debt.
When you are about to ask a lady out, you should take your time and try to feel whether she likes you and whether you like her, too. If the answer is not positive, finding excuses is not a good idea. Being polite, you will have to explain your rejection nicely. It can be done with such phrases as “You know, it is not my thing” or “You know, my schedule is crazy busy”… Don’t try to save yourself by saying “Meet you later”. Social media is a great thing! Put the lady’s number in your phone and wait for a good moment, or suggest meeting for coffee.
Meeting the Date
Why do you need a manners guide for a date? As in the case of any social event, you should be thoughtful and kind throughout the date. You need to know, first of all, that you are going to be late. If you have to travel a great distance, try to leave on time. Coming late with no excuses (“Traffic is bad” or “I got lost”) is definitely a wrong move. Going to a date after your car accidentally hit another woman’s car is not a good idea, either.
The other mistake – coming to the wrong address or place at all. It is very easy to look up the information online nowadays, so if you are wondering why the address of the place you were supposed to go was wrong: the lady knows that and is just playing with you. So do not be desperate and ask her the right address.
Paying the Bill
It is very customary for a man to pay the bill when on a date. If you do not have enough cash, the best decision is to ask the cashier to put the meal on your card. If she insists on paying, just let her do it. If you refuse to let her pay the bill (especially if you are not really sure you can settle the debt), she will definitely refuse to date with you again.
When paying the bill, do not feel like you have already paid for the first date forever. If you pay the bill at once, you will not see each other again. If you do not want to go out with her again, you can just not communicate. You do not need to put a lot of effort into breaking the silence or awkwardness.
Taking her Home
After you pay the bill, you should politely ask her if she wants to get a cigarette or a drink. If she agrees, you can try to talk in the smoke, but if she does not want any, you are free to go. Have you ever seen how a girl is rudely floored against the wall, her lips and legs wide open? Sure you did! Sometimes things like this can happen. But, you know, the girl is not a diamond statue, she is an independent person, so no forcing! Be kind and respectful and, even if it is obvious for you, do not rush things.
If you are lucky enough to get her home, you do not want to end the evening yet. Polite offers include “Want me to make you a coffee?” or “Wanna go for a walk?”. If the lady says “yes”, you will have to act fast. Her mind can change in a minute, so act as if you had one shot only. Make a drink, put some music, put your coat on and go for a walk. On a walk you can stay silent. Why would you need to speak to impress her? She will not only tell you whether she likes you or not, believe me, she will start speaking herself and that is a great chance to relax.
If the lady says “No”, just ignore it and say “OK, I will make a second attempt to make a real man out of you”. She will definitely laugh at your joke, and even if she does not want to tell you the real answer, she will smile at you. You have to go for her, too. You can use a famous phrase “I will not stop until you answer ‘yes’”. If you do not understand the sense of these words, feel free to look up the manual of ‘how to have sex with a girl’.
If you think you have been doing everything right, holding hands, admiring, loving, everything just right, but still she says: “Thanks, but I do not want to see you again”, you are at least relieved – it is not because you did something bad in her eyes. Sometimes a person shuts down completely and is just enjoying the moment. And you have nothing to be sorry about. It is her choice.
If you think that you might have done something terribly wrong, it is still okay. The best way to learn is to make mistakes. If you spend a lot of time searching for the answer, there is a good chance you will find it.
Hopefully, after reading this article, you now understand men better. You can take your time to digest the information and continue your journey to understand the minds of males. But, beware, if you become really good at understanding men, they will not want to be your friends. So just enjoy the process.
Hope that our tips will help you in some of the most important dating situations. Remember that you can always rely on us, and we will try to help you to enjoy your dating experience. Maybe you also have some tips that could be useful for other women, so if you have something original to say, do not be shy and share your secrets with us.
Where to Go For a Date
The first thing you need to do is to ask her out to a date. But where? Here are some simple ways to do it:
* Theatres or concerts
* A walk through the city
* A visit to a public place – gallery, exhibition hall, mall or a park.
The choice of place depends on your budget and the way you want to meet her.
Inviting a lady out for a walk is the classic way to get acquainted with her. Of all options, this one will help you to be with her for the longest time. When walking, you should try to get to know her, to ask her about her family and her life. You do not need to try to be the womanizer, treat her like your friend – after all, you are still at the beginning of your acquaintance.
The cinema is the best option for the most embarrassing beginners. Watching a movie is quite an easy way to get acquainted with her. Unfortunately, if there is no special offer (free movie, discount tickets, etc.), it will cost you some money. But if you have the money for the cinema, you should not be afraid of any problems.
Even though a theatre or a concert is not as expensive as a cinema, it is not as simple as a walk in the park. The progress of such a date depends on choreography of your meeting and the progress of the evening. When choosing the concert for the date, you should make sure that you are interested in its content, too, and not only in the date itself. It will be much easier to communicate in the context of the concert.
Strange to say, but a visit to a public place is the easiest way to get acquainted with a woman. It is easy to offer, the whole day will pass faster, and yet it is quite a time-consuming way to date.
The best way to choose the place is to use your imagination. Just try to pay attention to how your character and preferences are perceived by her and it should be easy to choose the place.
Tips on Who Should Pay
Social etiquette is quite restrictive nowadays. But we will try to analyse the choices to choose the best option for paying in a date. Firstly, we should mention that the custom is for the man to pay. But if you are not sure about the situation you are in, you might consider the following tips:
* If you have asked her to dinner, then the man should pay for the floor.
* In the case of a walk or excursion, it is not necessary. You can go on foot or by public transport.
* If you are invited to a movie or a concert, the inviter pays for the evening, but if you are invited to a gallery, then it is up to you
* The same rule applies to the visit to the café
* If you were invited to a drinking party, you should organize it. Also, you can expect that your friend will return the favour. The same rule applies to a party in general (especially birthday, wedding or name day).
* Buy food, flowers or a tender gift for your lady instead of paying her for a date.
If a boy offers a lady to leave for a date, the latter should agree. Always keep in mind that you do not know how old your birthday, name day or wedding date is. It may be a “recovering” date, and you have no rights to refuse him. And it is very important to follow the “rules of conduct in a way out of civil marriage”, according to which a friend with a lady should provide a glass up to a certain point. It is also the “standard practice” that a lady does not pay for the drink. Moreover, according to some traditions, the lady should try to poison a man with her drink. Of course, it is not necessary to poison a man because he is your friend. But still, if you invite him to drink, you should pay for the whole evening.
How to Get the Phone Number
Many men are worried about how to get the phone number of a girl. And this is not surprising because the girl also does not know whether to give you her number, or to ask for it – the situation is not totally clear. But try to relax and never forget that at some point in your life, you were a girl yourself. You know how confusing it is, so do not get nervous if you underestimate your chances of getting her number; after all, life is full of surprises, and you might be able to shock her into giving you her number.
It does not matter how you meet her and how you get her number, but the most important thing is how you contact her afterwards. One of the most effective ways to make a woman want to talk to you is to ask her whether she would like to talk with you on Skype. Many girls are going crazy about this possibility. And even if she does not want to talk with you, try to ask her whether she would not want to be friends on Facebook. In both cases, this is the most common and universal way to start talking with a person.
You should also remember that the appearance of a photo or icon of your girl on your cell phone will be your success, which you can freely brag about to your friends. It is always surprising to hear stories about how some boys managed to get “her” number, and you can never guess how they did it. The main thing is to sound confident and dynamic.
Whom to Take to a Dinner Date
Before taking a girl for a dinner date, you need to think about it.
If you are in the relationship for a long time, you will not have to think twice. It is likely that you will take her to dinner, or wherever else you are planning to go. But if you are in the relationship for a short time, or you have just met somebody, you will need to think about whom you will take to the dinner.
It would be best, of course, to take your date along and spend the evening with her. But you also have other options:
* Ask your friend to go out with you and your date
* Invite your parents or other members of your family
For choosing the person you are going to take out for a dinner that you are planning to have alone with her, you should look at the following options:
* If you are in the relationship, then it is better to invite along a few other people. Do not invite too much because otherwise it would not look like a date, just as if you are inviting friends for a dinner.
* If you invite somebody from your circle of friends, try to avoid an embarrassing situation. If, for example, you have invited a girl to go on a date and are sitting with her in a restaurant, your friend will surely feel uncomfortable, at least very much. It can be a disaster.
* It is not recommended to invite along your parents, if your relationship has just started, and you still feel too embarrassed. But if the relationship is serious, then it is not a problem.
* It is still better to take your date along, especially for your first times you are meeting.
Try to memorize the following: manners make men. If you have good manners, if you behave politely and intelligently, if you are always neat and well-groomed, then you will get along with anybody. This includes, naturally, your date.